Clarks Furniture

CLARK'S FURNITURE Sell it. Haggle it. Lose your temper at it. Clark was supposed to be an architect. Now he runs Captain Clark's, a pirate-themed furniture store he named after himself and then added "Captain" to. He drinks too much, he yells too much, and nothing is ever his fault. Keep the store alive for 16 days. Sell recliners. Survive the customers. Try not to snap. HOW IT PLAYS - Talk to customers and pick how Clark pitches: do the pirate bit, just sell it, or tell the brutal truth. Every customer likes and hates different approaches. - Haggle. Give a deal, charge the tag price, bump it, or go for a full rip-off. - When a customer argues, press E to YELL BACK, with Clark's real voice lines. Knock down their backbone and they'll cave. Some walk away scared, some respect you, and yelling at a grandma will cost you. - Watch your TEMPER. Every argument fills it. If it maxes out, Clark has a full meltdown and kicks your furniture across the store. Hold BREATHE to cool down. - Deal with shoplifters, customers napping on your couches, angry refund demands, and a reporter writing down everything you say. - Restock between days in the Stock Room. Rent goes up every single day. EVERY CUSTOMER IS RANDOMLY GENERATED Different faces, bodies, hair, clothes, colors, hats, glasses and props. No two look alike. All of them are a problem: nervous Tim, Grandma Dot, Brenda who wants your manager, Big Duke, a rich guy with a monocle, a coupon-obsessed haggler, an influencer streaming live, an old sailor with a parrot, and a licensed architect who knows exactly how to hurt Clark. UPGRADES - Bigger Coffee, Stress Ball, Security Mirror, Megaphone, Neon Sign, Showroom Wing - The Captain Suit: homemade, duct-taped, with a wooden peg taped to his foot. Unlocks the PIRATE ACT. Some customers will clap and tip. Most will just stare. - Hire Kat and Bobby (unlocks on day 5). They sell to customers for you, and Bobby films ads for the store. If Clark yells while Bobby's recording, it goes viral. - Get enough ads and the store opens a SECOND FLOOR: the Captain's Quarters. THERAPY WITH MARY After every other shift, Clark sees his therapist, Mary. Be honest, make a joke, or pick a fight. Your choices carry into the next day. Push her too far and you'll find out what she really thinks. THREE ENDINGS Make it to day 16. Go broke. Or find something in the walls that you probably shouldn't walk into. EASTER EGGS The store is full of them. Look at the walls. Watch the cardboard captain by the door. Listen to the lights. CONTROLS PC: A / D or arrow keys - walk (or click the floor) F - talk to a customer E - yell Q - hold to breathe R - pirate act (with the Captain Suit) W / S - go upstairs / downstairs 1-4 - pick dialogue options Space - skip dialogue P / Esc - pause, M - mute PHONE / TABLET: Fully playable with touch. Hold the arrows to walk, tap customers to talk, and use the on-screen YELL, TALK and BREATHE buttons. Play sideways. If the screen comes out upside down, use FLIP SCREEN on the title screen. CONTENT WARNING Strong language, alcoholism, anger and mental health themes, and some unsettling moments. Mostly furniture. This is a fan game inspired by the movie Backrooms. It is not affiliated with A24 or the filmmakers.